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Depression in Relationships: What Both of You Can Do

Relationships can suffer from a variety of problems and often aren't easy to maintain. When you combine depression with all of the other factors influencing a relationship, however, maintaining a relationship can get even more difficult. When a person in a relationship becomes depressed, it can be difficult not only for the depressed person but also for his or her partner.

Because of the nature of the illness, it can be very difficult to keep a relationship going during a time of depression. Depression puts a strain on many relationships, causing a majority to collapse. In fact, marriages in which one partner suffers from depression are nine times more likely to end in divorce. With a lot effort on the part of both partners, however, it is possible for a relationship to survive through this difficult time.

Facts About Depression
Depression is a serious illness that affects 18 million adults in the United States. It is estimated that 2/3 of all people who suffer from depression do not seek treatment, even though eighty percent of all people with depression improve their lives significantly with proper treatment.

Symptoms of depression include:

• anxiety
• difficulty with memory
• disrupted eating schedule
• excessive crying
• fatigue
• feeling of emptinessguilt
• helplessness
• hopelessness
• inability to concentrate
• indecision
• insomnia
• irritability 
• loss of interest, even in former enjoyments
• oversleeping
• sadness
• suicidal thoughts
• weight loss or gain.

What the Depressed Person Can Do
One of the difficulties of depression is that depressed people often lack the motivation necessary to seek treatment or help themselves. However, there are a few simple things that depressed people can do to help themselves and, consequently, their relationships:

• Get daily exercise: Even though you may be too sick to work, or even do chores, consider getting exercise or at least taking a walk every day. It will do wonders for your state of mind to get fresh air and exercise.
  
  
• Keep working toward recovery: Take the proper steps to keep moving forward with your recovery. If your physician prescribes medication, make certain that you take the correct dosage. Also do not neglect therapy sessions and/or meetings.
  
  
• Remember that depression is only temporary: Even though depression might feel as if it will never end, it is important to remind yourself that your depression, no matter how severe, will eventually end if you actively seek recovery.

How Depression Affects Relationships
It is easy for non-depressed partners to think that they have somehow caused their partners' depression, but they shouldn't blame themselves. Here are some things that a non-depressed person can do to help his or her relationship:

• Be there for the depressed partner: Show unconditional love toward your partner, and help them with their daily tasks. Try not to be frustrated with your partner.
  
  
• Encourage your partner to seek professional help: Encourage your partner to get medical help, but do not force them to seek treatment. Of course, if at any time you think your partner may be suicidal, seek professional help immediately.

Also, offer to go to therapy sessions with your partner.

• Learn about the disorder: Take the time to learn about your partner's disorder. By informing yourself on what your partner is going through you will be in a better position to help them recover.
  
  
• Take some time for yourself: If you are constantly around a depressed person, you are likely to become depressed yourself. Try to take some time for yourself every day, even if it means just taking a five-minute walk.
  
  
• Seek professional help: Counseling groups are available for those who live with a depressed person. By attending these types of meetings, you will gain support and maybe even motivate your partner to go to therapy too.